It’s true; scientists need a few gentle reminders every once in a while in order to maintain order and cleanliness.  Just take a walk through CERN’s Restaurant 1 in the middle of the lunch hour, and you’ll be swarmed with a multitude of all-too-unpleasant smells resulting from lack of hygiene.  In many cases, a not-so-subtle scolding from a significant other will have an effect.  But, when it comes to more mundane habits like keeping one’s hands clean, we physicists really need more active guidance.  Therefore, CERN has implemented a 12 Step Program designed to educate its community in the ways of hand hygiene.  Nowadays, posted in several of the public lavatories around the lab, you’ll be lucky enough to find detailed instructions:

A tutorial.

From now on, you’ll never have to remember this intricate process yourself!  An especially useful tool for physicsists, this should also ensure prevention of a massive H1N1 pandemic here at CERN.  By following these steps (Wet, Soap, Wrists, Palms, Back of hands, Between fingers, Fingertips, Swirl fingertips, Thumbs, Rinse, Dry, and Turn off taps), you should have no problem keeping your hands squeaky clean.  Finally, if you have questions or feedback, feel free to jot your thoughts down on the poster in green ink.