Friday morning I was woken out of sleep by a fist punch to my right eyeball. My eyeball was punched hard enough that I saw a flash of white light behind my closed eyelids, in the dark room. It was my own fist, apparently directed by the hand of God. There was no dream that prompted this punch, and no immediate obvious explanation comes to mind, which is how I know it was God. Thanks dude.

I was pretty sure I was going to go blind, so I thought I’d try to maximize the remaining life out of my throbbing eyeball by heading to work. I headed to the tram stop where I heard some announcement being broadcast loudly but I couldn’t make out what it was saying. After waiting a little too long for the tram (I prefer sleek, quiet and smooth transport options over dirty, loud and bouncy) I gave up and jumped on a bus, the most crowded bus ever in the history of my career working at CERN. Eventually it became clear that the trams weren’t running at all because of a student demonstration obstructing the tram tracks, and they didn’t really call in extra replacement buses. OK. Note to self: student demonstration = “manifestation des étudiants.” Thanks, étudiants.

Then it was time to transfer to bus number 56 at Avanchet, which is the last time I will ever have to do that, incidentally. I waited for like 20 minutes (WAY TOO LONG, SOMETHING IS WRONG) and watched multiple 29′s go by until I realized the 56 ain’t coming. So I decided to hop on the next 29 and hike the rest of the way to CERN from P+R Planche. As I had walked just far enough that it wasn’t possible to turn back to catch any more buses, guess who rolled up?! BUS 56!! Followed about one minute later by another bus 56!! Thanks, Transports Publics Genevois.

FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUU…..