CERN Adventure Outfitters have created a new advanced utility belt specifically designed for the punishing environments of today’s physics lecture circuit.
Lecture Belt (TM) combines style with function. Never again be caught in the middle of a public lecture without your laser pointer, cell phone, Leatherman (TM) utility knife, camera, canteen, first aid kit and massive skeleton keys. The “keynote speaker” model comes with a carabiner for those hard-to-attach jangle-tastic belongings that happen to have a loop attached.
Forget pesky backpacks and briefcases! Attach everything to your waist, for best access.
CAUTION: Lecture Belt (TM) wearers may experience difficulty sitting down. Using urinals while wearing Lecture Belt (TM) is not recommended.